Unlike football or rugby or any other vaguely popular sport I dislike, I've always enjoyed watching the Olympics. I know football is part of the Olympics but the joy of it is theres more than likely to be another sport happening at the same time, a ridiculous weird one I'm likely to enjoy.
Here are 5 things I'm looking forward to about the next 14 [I think] days.
I also just realised just then my number nine key is broken, hence the square brackets.
1.Flags
Every year the summer or winter Olympics are on I always discover a new country and feel a little bit smarter after. There's always a bit of excitement when next to Russia, Russia, China, Kenya, Russia and USA stands Mr. Tuvalu [actual country, just googled 'worlds smallest countries]. Its a learning experience, we find out snippets of information here and there about the world and then see them fight it out against each other to see who's better. Because knowledge is power!
I just really hope Bhutan win something so this flag of badassery can be hoisted up in the stadium
It's like something out of Skyrim
2. Underdogs
Leading on from the small unknown countries point, I always like backing the underdog team on the rare occasion I watch sport. It's not just the small countries I'll be backing, but also the countries that play sports that make no sense for them to be playing.
For example, Canadian Beach Volleyball, swimmers from landlocked countries like Chad or Zambia.
There's also always the gymnast who's just a little bit fatter than the rest or the diver who looks about 80 years old. These are all the people I'll be rooting for.
And I'll no doubt feel bad when cheering on the one white person in the 100m, not because I'm a villainous racist, just because they're the odd one out.
There she goes
3.Diving
Something actually sporty and fully Olympics related?! Yep, I'm a fan of the diving. I don't really care who wins or loses; it just looks very impressive and impossible. Its the one sport I watch, along with the gymnastics that makes me think 'how they doing that huuuh?' The fact someone has to win and lose annoys me. If I ran the Olympics everyone would win a medal for impressing me just a little bit and everyone would go home happy. It'd take the competitive element out but I'm sure everyone would still have fun. Like being at a circus or something, its just entertaining to watch.
4.Horsey Stuff
I like the equestrian events just because they look so out of place beside every other event, especially when you press the red button and see a man with a curly moustache trotting along next to 2 guys kicking the shit out each other in Judo and the physically exhausted faces of people finishing the 10000m below that. It's also a sport Britain apparently win a lot at, basically because most other countries can't afford it.
It's also quite majestic I think, I'm glad there's at least one animal event at the Olympics. I can see Elephant Polo being a hit at Tokyo 2020 [my six key has now broken as well otherwise that would've been Rio 201six]
Hyrule obviously sponsoring this particular match with the triforces in the background
5.Britain Cocking Things Up
I'm sure everything at London 2012 will run swimmingly. But there's a part of me that really hopes at least something, very British, goes wrong. I've heard the offroad BMX event is being held at a nearby farm so I'm just imagining cows and pigs escaping from pens, running between cyclists in panic.
I'm also imagining the swimming pool being too cold to enter or Fathers For Justice postponing track events sitting on top of the stadium roof dressed as Batman and Robin. I don't want anything serious obviously, just something that'll get a laugh.
'Thought I'd just stand up here and spectate k?'
That's it almost 5am now, thanks to my ricockulous sleep pattern, so that means the Olympics officially start in about sixteen hours. I won't catch the silly farm-style opening ceremony but I look forward to having the games on in the background as I play minecraft or something mildly more interesting
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