A Christmas Like - Advent Calenders

You are never too old for an advent calender

Not entirly sure how it's magical, but it's chocolate for breakfast

What's not to like? Nothing get's you more stoked for christmas than a little picture of santa and a small mould of chocolate every single morning.

If you're one of these people who don't eat the chocolate as soon as you get up then you my friend are doing Christmas wrong. It's the only time of year where it's half acceptable to eat chocolate for breakfast. No judgment from me ofcourse, I had a full BBQ bacon chicken breast for breakfast yesterday. Was delicious.

You have to be careful what advent calender you choose, it's not a simple process. Cadburys is usually fine, M&S are k, but stay the hell away from a company called Kinnerton. They specialise in ruining holidays for children.

Give your child one of these and you have ruined their Christmas

Why are they so bad? A main reason is they don't have any foil so therefore aren't officially advent calenders at all. I mean siriusly, whats an advent calender without foil? As a child theres a certain tension as you start to slowly rip it to reveal what chocolate will be underneath, similar to Link opening a chest in Zelda. Don't know what I'm talking about? Play literally any Zelda game.

Secondly I'm not entirly sure all of them have pictures on the insides of the doors. The hells that about? It's what advent calenders used to be before they were made better with chocolate. I can't think of anything that can't be made better with chocolate to be honest. Car rides. Films. Marshmallows. Sexual partners.

Chocolate, msking life better

 Similarly I hate advent calenders with '10 DAYS TO GO!' on the inside. We know, there's quite clearly 10 more doors left to open.

Or  nine seeings as advent calenders only go up to the 24th for some reason.

Lastly the chocolate is just horrible. You wonder how they can get it so wrong, surely they must taste it before they pour into moulds of poorly shaped candles and presents. It's exactly the same with the easter eggs they do, I'd rather eat liquorice. And liquorice is awful.

I understand this was supposed to be a positive post and I still think it kinda is. Advents calenders are a great part of christmas, as long as theres foil, pictures and chocolate in nice shapes that don't taste of sadness.